A Stancepocalypse got here raining down on the quiet seashore city of Ocean City, Maryland this 12 months. It’s in ruins, its important strip and facet streets laid to waste by a swarm of illegally low vehicles. Town is just not sitting idly by! It calls for a return to order. It calls for respect. It calls for pickleball, and/or the Nationwide Guard.
H2Oi, essentially the most ticketed automobile present in America, was officially cancelled this year. However that didn’t cease what will need to have been 1000’s of modified automobile house owners from assembly on the nice and cozy waters of the Atlantic in late September to see their pals, eat plenty of crab and in addition publish snaps of some man in a Miata doing a burnout in entrance of a cop.
Sooner or later within the weekend, the cops went after a man for having weed, he made a run for it and ended up hitting two officers earlier than leaping into the bay. After that weekend, town vowed that it might do one thing, that it might act.
Now, tonight, the Ocean City Council is addressing safety and security for H2Oi and different automobile exhibits at their assembly, and their “motor occasions motion plan” is, uh, fairly one thing.
“Immediate action is required to reverse this undesired trend of lawlessness, civil disobedience and disrespect for our town,” the action plan reads, asking for rolling road blocks, a curfew, speed humps and other more mundane measures, like timing roadway construction to start right before events.
Should all of that not work, Ocean City proposes keeping the National Guard on call:
H2Oi is not the only “motor event” that takes place in Ocean City, and is far from the only one to be filled with dudes doing haggard burnouts. Conveniently, the city ranked how these events sit in their eyes:
It would appear the Corvette people know how to behave themselves; perhaps they are happy sticking to the antique stores and playing Bobby Darin on their Delco radios at a reasonable volume.
What does the city propose take the place of a motor event like H2Oi? A. Youth Sports Tournaments, Pickle Ball Championship, or Senior Citizen Olympics.
With these measures, the wicked and incomprehensibly dangerous and destructive scourge of stance cars may finally clear out from the blissful utopia of Ocean City. The cloud may someday lift, like a that last bit of tire smoke wafting away across the water.
Please find these documents right here on the City of Ocean Metropolis web site, with its action plan and event rating papers. Might Ocean Metropolis be protected against camber, underglow, three-piece wheels and widebody kits from this present day forth.
Jalopnik will replace this story once we know the way the council selected to behave.